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In the hilarious sequel to the bestselling “momoir” This Little Piggy Went to the Liquor Store, A.K. Turner returns with the mayhem of motherhood. From preschoolers blurting obscenities in public places to living with her in-laws in Mexico, Mommy Had a Little Flask delivers a delightfully raw and honest account of family life in Turner’s latest laugh-out-loud confessional.
Praise for A.K. Turner
“It’s rare for a writer to actually make me laugh out loud, but A.K. Turner does just that.” -Robin O’Bryant, bestselling author of Ketchup is a Vegetable & Other Lies Moms Tell Themselves
“I laughed out loud at Mommy Had a Little Flask, but make no mistake, this book is equally heartfelt and humorous as A.K. Turner delves into all the wonders, challenges and horrifying playground moments of parenting–the most extreme sport there is.” -Cameron Morfit, Sports Illustrated
“Empty bladder before reading.” -Laurie Notaro, New York Times bestselling author of The Idiot Girls’ Action-Adventure Club.
“Witty, honest and funny as hell. Fans of This Little Piggy Went to the Liquor Store are guaranteed to have another great time.” -Holand Peterson, author of the Eville series
This Little Piggy Went to the Liquor Store “candidly reveals and revels in the flaws and dysfunctions of the author and her family. Turner is not afraid to voice her private thoughts and never takes herself too seriously… refreshingly honest.” -Publishers Weekly
“Did Erma Bombeck ever guzzle vodka? If she did, she might have come close to the ribald domestic humor in Turner’s “momoir” This Little Piggy Went to the Liquor Store.” -The Quivering Pen
“The perfect cross between Nora Ephron, David Sedaris, and Chelsea Handler.” -Elaine Ambrose, Menopause Sucks.
“If laughing at ourselves is the best medicine, then reading A.K. Turner will ensure you live long enough to drive your own kids crazy.”
-Stacy Dymalski, comedienne and author of Confessions of a Band Geek Mom
also available on Nook
Highland Blessings is the story of a highland warrior who kidnaps the daughter of his greatest enemy and clan chief to honor a promise he made to his dying father. Bryce MacPhearson, a highland warrior, kidnaps Akira MacKenzie on her wedding day to honor a promise he made to his dying father. While Akira’s strength in the Lord becomes a witness to Bryce, she struggles to overcome her anger and resentment when he forces her to wed him, hoping to end a half-century-old feud between their clans. While Akira begins to forgive, and Bryce learns to trust, a series of murders leaves a trail of unanswered questions, confusion, and a legacy of hate that once again rises between their families. Clearly, a traitor is in their midst. Now the one man Akira loves no longer trusts her, and her own life is in danger. Can Bryce look beyond his pain and seek the truth? Will Akira discover the threat against her before it’s too late? How will God turn a simple promise into bountiful Highland blessings?
My Occasional Torment is for The Rest Of Us, who are typically absent from the beautiful people descriptions within the pages of Erotica. All of us imperfect, middle-aged and past-middle-aged souls. We have not left the planet nor are we indefinitely sequestered inside a convent in Antarctica. At least not within the pages of My Occasional Torment. In these pages, through the ordeals of 53-year-old Julia Connery, The Rest Of Us get to experience youthful, gorgeous, seemingly indestructible Erotica gets its sexual ass kicked by a past-middle-aged married woman who knows what the good, long-lasting stuff is really all about.
Anthropologist Dr. Bill Brockton founded Tennessee’s world-famous Body Farm—a small piece of land where corpses are left to decay in order to gain important forensic information. Now, in the wake of a shocking crime in nearby Chattanooga, he’s called upon by Jess Carter—the rising star of the state’s medical examiners—to help her unravel a murderous puzzle. But after re-creating the death scene at the Body Farm, Brockton discovers his career, reputation, and life are in dire jeopardy when a second, unexplained corpse appears in the grisly setting.
Accused of a horrific crime—transformed overnight from a respected professor to a hated and feared pariah—Bill Brockton will need every ounce of his formidable forensic skills to escape the ingeniously woven net that’s tightening around him . . . and to prove the seemingly impossible: his own innocence.
Contains all four episodes of ASCENDANT, the epic, coming-of-age novel set in post-apocalyptic America where a small portion of the population has been gifted with telepathic abilities…
IN THE PEOPLE’S REPUBLIC OF AMERICA, even the smallest sign of rebellion is punishable by death. The government uses “ments”–individuals with telepathic abilities–to enforce its tyrannical measures. 17-year-old Michael Cairne is one of these gifted people, only he doesn’t know it yet.
Unlike other ments, Michael’s ability is dangerous. He is the result of a government experiment that left him an orphan and was a resounding success. But Michael was the only one who came out of it alive. Now, Harris Kole, the nation’s cruel dictator and also the man who killed Michael’s mother, will stop at nothing to get him back.
Aided by a former military officer with a mysterious link to Michael’s birth, and a beautiful girl with a rare gift of her own, Michael will cross the border into the ruins of Colorado to live with other outcasts like him. Here, through an unexpected romance and a twisted betrayal, he will discover the true extent of what his mind can create, and the lives that it can destroy. He will learn the terrible cost of love, and the reason that men make war.
CONTAINS A FOUR-CHAPTER SAMPLE OF TRAINLAND, A HORROR-ADVENTURE NOVEL ABOUT A FATHER WHO GOES TO HELL TO SAVE HIS DAUGHTER’S SOUL.